Two days in a row whoohoo. Not that anyone reads my blog lol. Still filling in the past year before it ends. I had two losses is my life. My best friend passed away January 8th and it was so devastating to me. She had been sick for awhile but no one thought she would die she was only 45! Then in April of this year my step father passed away. Over the past two years he was fighting cancer and I did all I could to make those years as good as it could be. My mom took good care of him and it broke her down. Now we face the holidays without him and some other family member isn't treating her well. She is depressed enough and this is not what she needs. We don't live close by and it is a 45 minute drive there and I wish I was able to go there more and take her out of the the situation. I'm trying to be in the spirit of Christmas but it's hard. Doing something nice for others makes me feel good so that is what I'm doing. Have a good weekend all. Getting buried by snow the past 4 days and it's still going!!

Hello all a lot has changed since I last posted. I have a grandson who will be 7 months on Christmas. They live with me and it's great and bad at the same time. I'm the built in babysitter and I don't have much time to myself but he is so sweet that it doesn't bother me as much as it should. There are times I'd love to run away because it's all so overwhelming and I need space and time for me. Well all I can do is try to get through it all and enjoy the blessings. Take care all

Still here

Yes, still here though I do not post a lot I have been reading many blogs and learning new things. I have started Weight Watchers online and hope to do well on it. It seems like everyone starts there life changes in January but my start is not the typical one that you start but it fizzles by the end of the month. I've put it off long enough and if I don't do this now, it will never be done. My health issues will get worse and I hate to think of what will happen to me. I'm not one to post my weight etc on here but wanted to at least mention my start on this journey. I'm embarrassed at how far I have let myself go and wish I could post all the details like others do but shame keeps me from doing so. It begins now and at least I have my mom doing the same thing with me and my family backs me up with it so that is a plus on my side. Take care all.

A Christmas gone by...

Seems so long ago we lived in this house and had all these keepsakes and memories of many a holiday. I can look at some of these pics and see things I had and cherished. Yes, it has made me sad and grumpy this Christmas but I am forever grateful that I have my family this Christmas. I guess it is time to make more memories although new they will be with me forever.

Almost a year has passed since the fire but it feels just like yesterday is that weird? I don't know I just feel raw still and I keep trying to make plans to do fun lil things like make cookies and watch Christmas movies but no matter what I end up at the same place lol. Well I have made out my Christmas cards and my tree is up and yes there are some lights up outside lol. Next week I have plans to make cookies with friends and family and learn how to make fudge..should be interesting. I hope all of you are having a great Christmas time. Take care

I DON'T HAVE A TITLE

Feeling brain dead but wanted to post anyway lol. Also, feeling blahhh for a month or so now. Feel like something is missing but not sure what it is. Yesterday was the 11 th anniversary of my dads death. He was only 47 and some young guy in a red mustang took his life. We weren't that close but I miss him. He wasn't the greatest of men..but I miss him. I miss my family. Some relatives close to me have decided over the past five or so years that we shouldn't do the holidays. Now my family has always been close and done things and gotten together. Yes, when I was younger I loved the gifts the most lets face it lol. Now that I am older and have a child of my own I long to make more memories with her and for her to think back and remember family gatherings. Well this excludes a part of my family and it is just not the same. Something low key and nice for thanksgiving is all I wanted but I guess my low key is going to be just the three of us. I should be use to it but ever since the fire I hold my family and my memories closer to my heart and it hurts more. Like Forest Gump said "that's all I got to say about that" lol. Take care all maybe next time I will be in a better mood.

Getting Back to Normal

Ok well hello all. This is the second attempt at posting this week. The first time I tried frustrated me because I had typed it all and looked over it and was going to post and it disappeared lol. It wasn't so funny when it happened but I'm going to give it another try now that I'm not angry lol.

Well I am going to try to make this short because I am eager to get past this in my blog. I stayed with my friend and my daughter and hubby stayed with his brothers family. A house with seven children in it lol.. yes I said seven. My one child being there made it eight kids and three adults in the house. Ahhhh I am so glad I chose to stay with a friend because I don't think I could of dealt with the noise. My hat is off to my sister in law because that is alot of work phheww just thinking about it tires me lol. We were homeless for about a month. I happened to fall into getting a place that a friend of mine was moving out of. There was alot of work to be done as we were moving things in. Hectic is an understatement and we were very impatient. Thank goodness we finally got in and settled and thanks to having renters insurance we were able to have furniture etc. It was alot of work but for sure was worth it. I can't wait to have Christmas here. We had Easter dinner here and a couple of bbqs. It is just nice to have a place that is your own. The saying you don't miss it until you don't have it is very true.

So now I am settled and it is my daughters bday as well as mine and my anniversary this month. She is a senior this year and I know that I am going to be crazy busy with things but I welcome it. I craved normalcy for so long that now that I have it I take time to look around and enjoy life, even the crazy times lol.

I would like to change this blog but I don't remember how to and it looks like it has changed since I changed it the last time.. OH well all in good time.

Take care all

Hellooo again

Hey all it has been a long time. It hasn't been easy putting my life back together so please excuse my lack in posting lol.
I think I left off where I had just been told my house was in flames and could not be salvaged. By the time I took a shower etc and went down to look at my home they were demolishing it because it could of fell on the neighboring houses. It was still smoldering a bit. I don't know how to describe it. It was like I was watching someone elses life because how could this be happening to me. My mind was on my daughter who didn't know yet that this happened and having a fun weekend with her church friends. How was I going to tell her everything was gone. I was heartbroken thinking about telling her that her cat had not made it and all that she knew and had was gone. I cried knowing that I had to be the strong one and couldn't break down because who else would hold us together after this. All day long I cried but I knew when my daughter got back it would have to stop lol. When we told her she was so sad it broke my heart. She asked me where would we live and what do I do now. I told her we will stay with family and friend and we will do our best to have our own place and be together as soon as possible. Thank god we had renters insurance and wonderful family and friends. I stayed with a friend and my husband and daughter stayed with family. To say it was hard to be apart is an understatement lol. Well that's enough for now. I get all teary eyed every time I think about this but it is good to get it out. Take care all.